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November 18, 2016 warringtononlineblog

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OldChinaHand is the avatar of Phil Pimentil, a former Detective Inspector in the Royal Hong Kong Police. He has been a semi-pro musician for many years, and now aspires to be a writer of musical comedy and blogger. Sum Presentialiter Alens In Remota View all posts by warringtononlineblog

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OldChinaHand @ warrington-online.com

The Bodyguard December 8, 2016
This extract from The Venomous Bead’s blog caught my eye: So it was that I found myself shadowed by a tiny man of over seventy years of age – the Costa Rican version of Cohen the Barbarian (which one?) – as I entered the Art Deco edifice of the Banco Nacional. Drawing my money […]
warringtononlineblog
How is British Humour Different? December 5, 2016
Do you want the short answer, or have you got all day? The short answer is that the British laugh at the same things everyone else does. It’s only when you start to look at lists like Top 50 British Jokes that you begin to see that, while we laugh at anything and everything, we […]
warringtononlineblog
Wine and Beer November 29, 2016
Wine and beer we’ll drink without fear, We’ll drink a success to The Innocent Hare. (Trad. song) Our good friends Q and A meet about once a month to go for a meal. Today, we find them in Herman’s Hermitage, just next door to Hernando’s Hideaway in Norton Throssle. (Should be somewhere like Horton Heath […]
warringtononlineblog
WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD? November 26, 2016
Freud: An die andere Seite zu kommen. (Much laughter) Hamlet: That is not the question. Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I’ll find out. Jack Nicholson: ‘Cause it (censored) wanted to. That’s the (censored) reason. Very practical answers, but for deeper meaning we must turn to: Plato: For the […]
warringtononlineblog
Q and A November 25, 2016
Q and A are a couple of friends of long standing. Their sense of reality becomes a little warped after The Second Pint (there should be a link to a song here, but I haven’t written it yet), and they have to keep warning each other,’Don’t Go Beyond The Handrail‘. (Yeah, it’s another link. I’ve […]
warringtononlineblog
1947 And All That August 5, 2013
According to Wikipedia, the Tanganyika Groundnut Scheme was a plan to cultivate tracts of what is now Tanzania with peanuts. It was a project of the British government. It was abandoned in 1951 at considerable cost to the taxpayers when it did not become profitable. Ground nuts require at least 500 mm (20 inches) of rainfall per […]
warringtononlineblog
The Fibonacci spiral applied | The k2p blog July 26, 2013
Now that’s what I call a spiral The Fibonacci spiral applied | The k2p blog
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Biker who lost sex drive after plunging off cliff while being chased by dogs wins six-figure payout| Metro News July 16, 2013
Apparently the Sex Drive was located just next to Reverse. Biker: My sex life fell off cliff after chase | Metro News.
warringtononlineblog
Kuebiko Drafts Scarecrow Charter July 3, 2013
It is widely rumoured that Kuebiko, the Scarecrow God, is going to present a Scarecrow’s Charter at the Wilmslow Scarecrow Festival this Saturday. The charter is intended to protect the rights of scarecrows. A first draft of the charter has been leaked, although apparently not by Edward Snowden, and we are pleased to be able to produce […]
warringtononlineblog
Funny men attractive to women but only those looking for a one night stand May 30, 2013
This example of in-depth research is the key to finding the kind of men women want. Makes you think, doesn’t it? Do you suppose 40 Liberal Arts students would be more or less inclined to find funny things to do with chocolate and hairspray than 40 Psychology students?
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